So GearBox sent me some Duke Nukem Forever swag....

piscian18

piscian18

[H]F Junkie
Joined
Jul 26, 2005
Messages
11,020
I have to confess I didn't buy Duke Nukem Forever until it was a dollar on Onlive. I was excited because GearBox was doing it(though I later found out they were just a cleaning crew). I joined the first access club and all that. I played the Demo when it first came out. It looked dated and was generally not enjoyable. HL2 looked nicer and had better physics. Anyway I think because I took that "Why is Duke Nukem awful?" survey they sent me some swag. Edit *

Congratulations! You won Duke Nukem Forever swag. You were randomly selected from over 30,000 people that participated in the latest survey for Gearbox Software.

They sent to my old address but the missus sent me pics and I wanted to share.

I like GearBox. They for all their faults seem like a decent group. From what I've gleaned 2K had a shitty incomplete DNF they wanted too recoup losses from and contracted Gearbox to finish it. I can't imagine what it's state was before gearbox touched it. It also seems like theres some sort of profit sharing in the contract because Gearbox seems to be infatuated with supporting the game and trying to win back gamer support for future releases(I'll admit that DLC they're selling for a game that's already failed was pretty dumb though. Anyway here the swag..

dukenukemcrap.jpg

nukenukemcrap2.jpg

nukenukemcrap4.jpg

nukenukemcrap5-1.jpg

nukenukemcrap6.jpg

nukenukemcrap3-1.jpg


Note* I still haven't played it. Tried. Everything on Onlive looks like shit.
 
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I did the survey, they sent me ZIP. Maybe because nobody cares about Canadians.
 
Well there are so many things that adds up that makes duke awful.

1. outdated gfx.
2. seems like a mix of other game ideas
3. uncreative
4. too linear in level design
5. dumb ai
6. consolized
 
I just recently beat Duke for the first time (like 3 days ago) on Hard mode. I hated a couple of things,

1) When you zoom in on any of the weapons it looked like CRAP. (This was BAD, I could not believe this SHI*)
2) Could not save when I wanted too
3) Carry only 2 weapons and had to change it to 4 on the menu
4) I had everything max out @ 3240x1920 and looked outdated.
5) Some levels where very annoying, the underwater crap was a pain.

Things they did right

1) Change your FOV view
2) Some of the jokes where funny
3) Love at the beginning they say duke get your armor "shows halo green armor" and duke says something like armor is for PU***S. I could not stop laughing. Went downhill after this.

Overall I wont play it no more. It unlock some cool videos of the entire making of Duke Nukem and how it look after every engine change.
 
The key to enjoying Duke Nukem is to pretend that it's 2006. The jokes suddenly become relevant and the graphics, while still not great, are pretty good.
 
I enjoyed Duke Nukem. Price was great for the hours in entertainment on campaign mode. Characters are the same but have much more interaction and better graphics / audio. I had a few checkpoints that failed to load and needed to restart at last checkpoint but ehh.

If you want to relive some childhood memories, this game is a great refresher.
 
Glad you got your swag!

BestBuy has DNF XBox/PS3 for $4.99.. still is $4.99 and any amount of time taken from your life to play this game too much to ask for something Kyle described as..

.. Duke Nukem Forever.sucks big fat Donkey Balls. Some of the worst alien AI I have ever seen. Regen health and weapons carry limitations? WTF Duke? Graphics that even make DX9 seem new? It even makes Crysis 2 look good. And that is just really hard for me to say. Thanks for boning my pooper for $50 Gearbox. If I had known you were going to butt bang me this bad, I would have shot myself up with AIDs first and put us all out of Duke's laughable legacy misery. http://www.hardocp.com/news/2011/06/20/duke_nukem_forever_sucks_donkey_balls
Click to expand...
 
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