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Recommend a new GPU for me

Scizyr

Scizyr

Limp Gawd
Joined
Jun 24, 2015
Messages
235
Hello, I'm looking to upgrade the graphics cards in my desktop but I've run into a predicament. I only purchase graphics cards that have hot rendered women on the box. My current card is a Sapphire AMD Radeon 7950:
Sapphire_Radeon_HD_7950_OC_1.JPG

I've been looking around for possible upgrades but I can't seem to find any companies that put hot rendered women on their boxes. Even Sapphire has stopped this great practice.

Please help me out. I'm open to any cards newer than the one I have from either Nvidia or AMD and I have no set price. Provide pictures of the box art if possible.

Thanks.
 
Yes yes these are nice witty comments however they don't help me in securing a new GPU. Now please, everyone knows there is a direct correlation between hot women on graphics card box art to frames per second in game. It used to be a highlight of Kyle's reviews here back in the day before he was accused of misogyny and subsequently changed the review format.

Btw, the card I had before the 7950 was the AMD Radeon 4870 and it had a hot rendered woman on the card! I honestly think it was faster than my current card because of that even though it was several generations older. However I can't test this because my 4870 died when the fan bearings failed.
Sapfront.jpg
 
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