calling all [H]Parents.

C

codegrinder

[H]ard|Gawd
Joined
Jun 15, 2005
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What kind of content filtering software you using for your kids? I don't want to use a content filtering router because i like my m0n0 wall set up. I know there is net nanny but i have heard its not the great.
 
My best advice? Supervise your kids' use of the internet. Seriously. Filtering software implies that you don't trust them.

Relatives have a 13-year-old male child. His comp is set up in the living room in plain view of his parents at any given time. ;)
 
I have a sixteen year old son. The computer is setup in the living room and I run cybersitter as an extra precaution. He also knows that I read the router logs:)

Lyquist
 
Im not a parent, but I have a younger sister and since my parents pay for the internet and it took me many months for them to go from dialup to DSL I don't wanna loose my internet. All I do is share the other computers hard drive, and browse the temp directory from time to time and I use a router to filter out all sorts of bad words, or generally words you'd find on a pron site. I also read the router logs, and if I see shes visiting a website quite a few times I visit it myself, create an account and see whats up. If I deem it bad I block it, I also blocked every and any browser based chat site. For awhile I did run PC Anywhere so that i could login and see everything shes doing, without her knowing of course.
 
I'd just trust your kids...

Any kid of a geek will figure out how to bypass the protection quickly. Tor!
 
Coming from the other side, I had internet access with little monitoring from the age of 12 or so, and I still don't think it was especially harmful. (I'll be 22 this year, for the sake of perspective. [1])

IOW, don't be overly paranoid. It will work out. Try to raise the kids so they will handle it without you actively keeping them away from things you don't want them to see, and whatever you're afraid of them seeing, try to teach them what you think about it (and why) and how to handle it. It's ultimately more effective than a technical block they'll probably get around sometime or the threat of you barging in on them. (Though the latter is quite effective.)

[1] Come to think about it, I ought to find out when we got connected and celebrate the anniversary. :D
 
I have to disagree. There are ratings on games, movies, etc. Parents generally don't take a 10 year old to something rated R with violence, nudity, and language. Why would not you try to limit the internet the same way you would everything else?
 
Most antivirus suites have that built in.

Trend Micro has it built into Internet Security 2005.

We tend to use that or we have used We-Blocker a few times.

But both can be worked around.

I would just run Trend Micro Internet Security 2005 and have multi functions from antivirus and content filtering.
 
I think it depends on how savvy your kids are.
I have a couple teenagers in my house, and I don't run any filtering, they know I use the computers too and know a lot more about computers that they do.
So if I find something suspicious, I address it. I am straight forward with them and let them know what acceptable behavior is. I let them know that once my trust is broken, it not likely to come back any time soon. So if they do break the rules, punishment is swift and strong.

I figure they are going to do it a few times before I notice it, so they get no second chances.
 
Thanks for all the replies, I trust my kid, shes 5. It's the neighbors kids who I don't trust.
 
AMD[H]unter said:
Understood. I say trust them, and read temp and router logs.
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And make sure they are aware that you will be keeping an eye on where they go online.
 
Malk-a-mite said:
And make sure they are aware that you will be keeping an eye on where they go online.
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I agree, letting them know that you WILL find out where they having been going to may be a deterrent enough. Heck, going through the history or Temp Internet files is an easy place to go if they don't know how to clean that up but router log works also.

Deterance and warning is best, because then THEY KNOW that YOU will KNOW were they go.
 
There are few things more embarrasing than having to explain to your dad (or worse; your friend's dad) what you were doing on www.(insert random strange fetish here).com.

(No, not speaking form personal experience. I'm good at hiding my tracks. ;) )
 
I agree that trusting the kids is a good thing but then it depends on the kid. My oldest boy, who is now 15, has been playing games since doom 2 and surfing the internet since then as well and I have no problems with him. I've only checked on where he's been surfing the internet at a couple of times and there has never been anything suspicious.

Now my wife has two boys from a previous marriage and her oldest, who is 12, is another story. This kid gets straight A's in school but is still dumber than a doorknob. Just the other day he came right out and said that he had been doing searches and what not for the words "butt bangers" on the internet. He said this out loud right in front of his mother and me. Of course my wife made me that instant go and block those words for him and he got in a lot of trouble. He's done this type of thing on more than one occassion (see what I mean about dumber than a doorknob).

Anyway, I still prefer to trust most kids but certain ones just cannot be trusted and that's where the filtering and blockin software comes into play for me.
 
Conservative americans, bleh :p

I am now 20, I have been surfing the internet since I am 12, without surveillance. I find it annoying to be watched, and I think even kids deserve a certain amount of freedom. My question is: what are you scared of? Its going to be alot more effective for you to educate your kids about sexuality, drugs, and other important issues in life (not everyone is to be trusted), than placing some weak technical barrier in their way.

Rest assured, there are many ways for a child to be corrupted, and the internet is certainly not the most dangerous one of them. Kids at school may regularly be exposed to drugs, inappropriates sexual behavior, and other kids that severely lack social and moral education (I speak from experience, I've seen it many times, even in expensive private schools). You would be doing them a favor by teaching them how to efficiently dealing with such matters, rather than trying to shield them from it, and effectively making them unable to deal with it on their own.

So, yeah, I understand the protectionism. No father would want his daughter to be approached by sexual predators, but you won't always be there to watch her. So my advice is: teach your daughter not all men can be trusted, teach your son women are to be respected. Teach them your moral values without crushing their freedom, and they just might listen. You also should answer all their questions as well as you can. Seriously, if you don't educate your kids about sexuality at all... They risk ending up like that kid Paithar described...

That being said, my computer was always in the living room due to a lack of space in the apartment. I find that a more appropriate measure than blocking software if you want to watch your kids surfing habits (especially in the early ages, where they don't know what should be avoided). If the computer were in a separate room, I would almost never talk to my mom ;)
 
HHunt said:
There are few things more embarrasing than having to explain to your dad (or worse; your friend's dad) what you were doing on www.(insert random strange fetish here).com.

(No, not speaking form personal experience. I'm good at hiding my tracks. ;) )
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Your not the one whos mom caught him masturbating to a printed out picture of a woman with a coke bottle in her woo woo. Deep shit I was.........
 
HHunt said:
Coming from the other side, I had internet access with little monitoring from the age of 12 or so, and I still don't think it was especially harmful. (I'll be 22 this year, for the sake of perspective. [1])
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I am about the same age and got internet around the same time (maybe 2 years or so before you). However when I first got internet it was still all text based, and Mosaic came out a year or two later. Even then, the worst stuff you could get your hands on was pretty mild. It is a different world now, with hardcore porn sites easily found and offering free previews with pretty graphic material. I can understand why parents would be worried.
 
Darkstar850 said:
I am about the same age and got internet around the same time (maybe 2 years or so before you). However when I first got internet it was still all text based, and Mosaic came out a year or two later. Even then, the worst stuff you could get your hands on was pretty mild. It is a different world now, with hardcore porn sites easily found and offering free previews with pretty graphic material. I can understand why parents would be worried.
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Indeed, at the beggining, the internet was a much more serious place, but now, some people are doing everything they can to make profit. Even if it means polluting that great resource the internet is with all kinds of dirty spam...

But now, its simply *too easy* to access these things. Since Google came out with google images, I began using it very often to find reference pictures for all kinds of objects for the videogame I'm making with my friends. But as it turns out, Google image search has an "advanced mode". If you go in that mode, and disable the filtering, it will come up with alot more than you'd expect... So basically, its kind of hard to block this kind of traffic with basic blocking software. Unless you want to block all search engines (they all have image searches now). Worse. If you use kazaa lite, or any P2P software, its possible to download literally gigs of movies and all that. If I'm not mistaken, netnanny can't even filter that at all. And of course, even if you were to keep your kids from installing that stuff, their friends on MSN could always send them files, or do stuff with them on the webcam. Not to mention these very unorthodox IRC chat channels.

The internet, because of its anonymity, has become the paradise for a wide variety of perverts. I actually read some quite freaky stuff on somethingawful the other day... I didn't even know people that severely mentally affected existed... I won't give you more details. The point is, the only way to "surf safe" is to know what you're doing, what you are searching for, and what you are *not* searching for.

Which is why I advocate teaching your kids about these things... Because they tend to have this desire to seek what is forbidden a little too often, so you might be doing them a favor by explaining them what its all about, why its not healthy material, and why they shouldn't visit those sites. And well, if you have a young teenage boy, he's going to be exposed to that stuff sooner or later... I still remember when I was 14 and the other kids were all excited to be watching playboy magasines in the guy's bathroom some other guy had brought. I had no interest in these things. Why? Because I already knew exactly what was in there, and that it was of no real interest.

We're in 2005 now. Its no secret that 99% of men and at least 50% of women masturbate and tend to be rather curious from an early age. So maybe you should take the first step, discuss these things with your kids, and remain open minded. Trying to make it a taboo subject and hiding it from them won't do them no good. It will only make them less capable of dealing with these things when they encounter them, and they will encounter them.
 
IceWind said:
Your not the one whos mom caught him masturbating to a printed out picture of a woman with a coke bottle in her woo woo. Deep shit I was.........
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Man, that just made my day.

 
IceWind said:
Your not the one whos mom caught him masturbating to a printed out picture of a woman with a coke bottle in her woo woo. Deep shit I was.........
Click to expand...
Rule #1 - Destroy any and all physical evidence.

Kids should be watched, sure. But not constrained.
 
I agree with most of the above, that you should just monitor your kids yourself and know what they're doing, and teach them do's and dont's. I don't trust software to keep my kids safe, I'd rather teach them myself and know they are being responsible.
 
IceWind said:
Your not the one whos mom caught him masturbating to a printed out picture of a woman with a coke bottle in her woo woo. Deep shit I was.........
Click to expand...


Ooh .... dear.
Hahahahahahaaaaaha, etc. :D
A touch of paranoia is a good thing, and as someone said, avoid creating physical evidence.:p
 
I was just reading this thread and I wanted to add that kids will find ways round things you put on to stop them if they want to. Its in their nature.

I remember when I was six/seven (seriously) I socialed my way round all the AOL protections my dad had put on and then made my way on to some pron sites. All in all it wasnt that difficult.

I also taught everyone at my primary school how to bypass the password program the techerers installed, it popped up a few seconds after the desktop came up and if you clicked the start menu before then you had access to all the programs.

So bottom line, if they are determined they will succeed some how, best bet is to have it physically monitorable.
 
Weak technical monitoring will only make the parents feel safer. Besides, it is easy to forget to filter words like donkey so something will allways get through. Google image search had some interesting results for lettuce a while back.... Anyways, I remember playing the filter bypass game when I was a youth and it is no more difficult now so this is really a moot point. Filter or not there is no way to keep that material out. Monitoring logs would work, but it creates a destructive bridge between the parent-child trust and hurts the relationship much more that it could help the children.
 
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