Jackholes Make Traffic Move Faster

Works in Germany where they have good road manners. The US is too full of ass wipes to do it. It will always end with someone doing 30+ mph faster in the ending lane and then diving into the open lane. Usually without a blinker. I tend to use the closing lane til I hit the 500ft mark and then merge. Then, even as a BMW driver, I use my SIGNAL. I think that's a bigger problem that needs to be taught to kids in school now. Use your FUCKING SIGNALS.
 
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They're making traffic better.... riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. So over here where 101 has 2 lanes that splits off into 280 in San Francisco right after Candlestick only one of those lanes of 101 becomes 280, and since there's a long line of people who want to do 280 someone on the 101 side (sometimes 2 lanes over) inevitability wants to get into the 280 chunk of things, so instead of waiting his turn he decided to go to the last possible second to merge, but of course he can't because it's bumper to bumper in the 280 lane, so instead he sticks about 75% into the 101 lane and backs up traffic all along that part.... now explain to me how these jackholes improve traffic again?

To be clear a jackhole jumps in when there's no natural room and forces his way in, not just merges ahead of a bunch of slow pokes.
 
Obviously, the best solution is to have the two lanes merge into one *middle* lane, and then shift over, but... that's not gonna happen.

This is likely the best scenario for this. If neither lane is the correct lane, that would make both lanes be used while taking turns of who gets to merge next.
 
You definitely do not live in New Mexico. Here most pass on the right, go slow in the far left lane. Then folks get angry because they want to make a left turn but can't get in because the cars go slow now in the left lane and wind up forming long unbroken lines of cars (gee, could be why the LAW says pass on the right?). Far right lane is known as a right turn lane yet, even when you turn on your blinker 500 ft before you turn, the driver behind you stares at the flashing blinker light, makes zero effort to change lanes (the ALWAYS do this, I watch them in my mirror) and then they get mad at you because you dared to slow down and make a right turn while in the right turn lane.

It's not unlike those who race from red light to red light, apparently clueless that street lights are on a timer ...



Try the " big i " in Albuquerque NM some time ... you'll love it. Be sure to try it around 5 PM


now this is funny, because in VA we finally got a law passed where if you are caught driving slow in the left (passing) lane is now (as of July 1st) a pullable and fineable offense! lol! east coast shiz, you wouldn't understand!? ;)
 
There are 2 types of drivers.

BMW owners and people who act like BMW owners.

what do you think Ferrari owners would have to say about that?

edit: or were you referring to a Bulging Monster Wart?? ..Happy Haloween!!
 
There are even idiots that will pass to the right INTO THE EMERGENCY LANE to get around slower cars. If you do that shit here in my state in front of a LEO you'll get a ticket.

There is a bad intersection here where traffic will back up and I have seen many do just that, run down the emergency lane to get past someone turning left(just normal two lane road there not divided highway) One morning we were backup up and I saw this guy flying down the emergency lane and passing everyone, I started laughing so hard, because what he couldn't see was the State Trooper sitting in front of me :) .. I laughed even harder when the blue lights came on.

I also remember one time as a kid going on vacation we hit road construction, and with the backup several cars started running down the emergency lane to try and skip ahead of the traffic. Almost everyone started opening their passenger doors and blocking them, and finally a semi moved half way into the emergency lane to really put a stop to it. Zipper merging is ok when it is in a proper place, but when people use the emergency lane or a lane that is actually a turn lane not a merge lane for such things, I don't care what others do to stop them. Honestly they should have their license revoked if caught doing it, but most don't even seem to know it is illegal.
 
The correct procedure is for two lanes to form in this situation and each lane takes its turn to feed into the single lane from the front of the queue only.. It works if people know how to do it. It will probably work with autonomous cars. It probably won't work with humans who are as thick as two bricks.
 
The only way the "Zipper" will work is if EVERYONE were nice, courteous drivers. The fact is that vehicles provide a certain amount of anonymity. That anonymity usually reveals just how much of an asshat, that person you thought was so nice, really is.
 
I live in salem oregon, if someone signals they have a good 80% chance the person will let them in. If you pull this cut down the side crap traffic tightens up into a steel wall and they have no mercy for you.
I always let people in that signal and the "zipper" method works well here.
When I visit washington near Bellvue its like entering the thunderdome. I put on a black bandanna and draw black lines under my eyes dab some fake blood on the side of the car and use a dry erase marker to simulate paint transfer and I still get people aggressively cutting me off.

Dud literally went into a break down lane, gassed it, then slammed on his breaks with his nose wedged between me and the guy in front of me because I let a guy force his way in from a onramp. Which washington drivers near Bellevue do NOT LOOK when merging.
 
I think this just reaffirms that type a aggressive behavior is a trait that will get you ahead in life. Nice guys always finish last.
 
what do you think Ferrari owners would have to say about that?

edit: or were you referring to a Bulging Monster Wart?? ..Happy Haloween!!
tumblr_no58ksminJ1rkallao1_500.jpg

Heh
 
I think this just reaffirms that type a aggressive behavior is a trait that will get you ahead in life. Nice guys always finish last.

The important thing is that we always finish. Aggressive behavior is a surefire way to get you cleaned off the pavement with a pressure washer.
 
You definitely do not live in New Mexico. Here most pass on the right, go slow in the far left lane. Then folks get angry because they want to make a left turn but can't get in because the cars go slow now in the left lane and wind up forming long unbroken lines of cars (gee, could be why the LAW says pass on the right?). Far right lane is known as a right turn lane yet, even when you turn on your blinker 500 ft before you turn, the driver behind you stares at the flashing blinker light, makes zero effort to change lanes (the ALWAYS do this, I watch them in my mirror) and then they get mad at you because you dared to slow down and make a right turn while in the right turn lane.

It's not unlike those who race from red light to red light, apparently clueless that street lights are on a timer ...



Try the " big i " in Albuquerque NM some time ... you'll love it. Be sure to try it around 5 PM

Law says to pass on the right? Right lane is known as a turn lane?

I can tell you live in ABQ because you have no fucking idea what the rules of the road are and can't stop yourself from complaining.
 
The zipper merge works on paper or on a computer simulation but it DOES NOT work in real situations because there will always be a group of asshats that think they are more important than everyone else on the road. Anyone that is promoting the zipper merge can't, with a straight face, tell me that it is safe or correct for a car to be speeding in excess of 60 MPH in a merge lane while all of the other lanes are traveling less than 10 MPH waiting to merge. I've seen countless accidents because of a vehicle needing to exit the jam and move right to the emergency lane because of overheating, etc. only to get plowed into by the asshat doing 70 in the "zipper" lane just to the left of the emergency lane. There are even idiots that will pass to the right INTO THE EMERGENCY LANE to get around slower cars. If you do that shit here in my state in front of a LEO you'll get a ticket.
You're right, in a sense. I've been hit from behind 5 times specifically because I had someone merge in front of me doing 10-15mph under the speed limit. Those who do not merge properly should be prosecuted as vehemently as those who merge too fast and without proper clearance. Then, and only then, a zipper merge will work. Right now, it is the best thing we have, and those who wish to pass all other and push their way into the front will always be idiot asshats.
 
Just wanted to show your picture again, I see there's a bunch of people that don't know how to drive in this thread ;)


If there's lane use it.

again for even more imphasis.

I'll even go further: all you grandmas that are leaving "crash distance" need to stop. Stick your damn nose in the car infront of you's ass. There is no reason to leave empty asphalt exposed to the sun, for any reason.
 
I am surprised this is even a topic to talk about. Zipping is faster not for the cars involved in it, but for the rest of the traffic. Because you do not block up 3 previous junctions by single file trafic, but only one by using both lanes.
 
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By merging way after the lane ends at the last second. This jackhole doesn't slow down the exit lane by merging earlier. Traffic moves better for me, not much for the people on the left though.
 
again for even more imphasis.

I'll even go further: all you grandmas that are leaving "crash distance" need to stop. Stick your damn nose in the car infront of you's ass. There is no reason to leave empty asphalt exposed to the sun, for any reason.

That's saved my ass so many times, I'm going to tell you are objectively wrong on this point. Tailgating is NEVER OK.

I would also amend this to say that it's also created situations for people to change lanes safely.
 
When there is a lane closure, and it's very clear that that only one lane is useable I refuse to let people in that come running up. Like the other 50 cars sitting behind me are just there for no reason. I get so close to the car in front of me, and I don't even acknowledge they're there.

This is why they made the video.
 
It generally takes 90 minutes to wade through the traffic after a normal shift at work. I'll take 4 hours of overtime tacked to the end of my shift just to avoid the mess. Might as well turn my time into money instead of sitting in traffic. Clean driving record going on 38 years now means I must be doing something right behind the wheel.
 
I am in Los Angeles this week and I am honestly astounded at the quality of driver here. Everyone is incredibly assertive and despite massive numbers of cars traffic keeps flowing. If this was in Atlanta or any major southern city I believe that the highways would come to a complete stop, and dozens of accidents. I have seen 4 cars "broke down" on the highway. Not a single accident stopping and lanes of traffic. It is amazing.

I am not saying LA had good traffic. My point is the drivers here handle it amazingly well.
 
Driving is about winning.
They even like to change lanes without signaling and draft just like they do in NASCAR races. ;)

What helps a lot in LA are the timed ramps. Only one or two cars at a time are allowed onto something like the 405. It isn't a clusterfuck like in Atlanta with everybody trying to get onto 75/85.
 
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When there is a lane closure, and it's very clear that that only one lane is useable I refuse to let people in that come running up. Like the other 50 cars sitting behind me are just there for no reason. I get so close to the car in front of me, and I don't even acknowledge they're there.
Lol they do this in Thailand and there is still a way around it.

If there is even a slight curvature to your bumper like most modern cars, they will get the front corner of their car in that gap, forcing you to hit them if you want to go forward.
 
The separate topic we are talking about is - let's say a highway is splitting off, Highway A is 4 lanes, and splits off where the Left 2 Lanes go to Highway B North and the Right 2 Lanes go to Highway B South. Since it's rush hour and everyone is trying to get home, most everyone needs to go Highway B South, so the lanes for Highway B North are going at normal traffic speeds (~50-70mph) while the Highway B South lanes are at a crawl backed up. This doesn't apply to the zipper method, as plenty of idiots wait until they are pass all the backed-up traffic to try and get into the Right 2 lanes at the very last second.

Prime example of this that I deal with regularly: Nashville (aka Crashville or Smashville). The design of the 24/40/65 fustercluck doesn't help one bit; add in the highly impatient people that can't read the massive white-on-green signs that sit over and beside the highway that tell them what lanes go where; pretty much gridlock in the mornings and evenings.

As a semi driver, it's a bit saddening that taking surface streets gets me to my yard faster than the highway...
 
It makes the traffic flow better for them, and worse for everyone else who already merged and waiting for their turn. It's simple really. Imagine standing at a cashier at a supermarket. It doesn't matter how many lines the people waiting their turn form, the bottleneck will still be the cashier. It's the same on the road the bottleneck will be the part where there is only one open lane. It doesn't matter how many lanes the people behind use, if the one lane can only let trough one car per second.
 
Just wanted to show your picture again, I see there's a bunch of people that don't know how to drive in this thread ;)


If there's lane use it.

So much this. I'd like to know how long back these people stay in the lanes that aren't ending? How many miles before the merge should we all line up? 2? 3? 10?
 
I just love the shitbags who think ANY amount of following distance means they're free to pull in front of you.

I currently have the side of my van caved in because some jackass decided he was going to cut in front of me and brake-check this way (his truck's bumper was actually overhanging my hood) and I had to swerve to avoid him...right into one of those rolled steel shoulder barriers.
 
I just love the shitbags who think ANY amount of following distance means they're free to pull in front of you.

I currently have the side of my van caved in because some jackass decided he was going to cut in front of me and brake-check this way (his truck's bumper was actually overhanging my hood) and I had to swerve to avoid him...right into one of those rolled steel shoulder barriers.

You should have hit him.
 
If women were not allowed to drive traffic would go much faster. (Because there would be less cars)
 
It makes the traffic flow better for them, and worse for everyone else who already merged and waiting for their turn. It's simple really. Imagine standing at a cashier at a supermarket. It doesn't matter how many lines the people waiting their turn form, the bottleneck will still be the cashier. It's the same on the road the bottleneck will be the part where there is only one open lane. It doesn't matter how many lanes the people behind use, if the one lane can only let trough one car per second.

Again, it is not about speed of your road, but about not obstructing other roads. In your example, your supermarket cashier lane would be so long, it would obstruct others who are still shopping. If you would be in dual line instead, then the line would be half as long, thus obstructing less of the traffic.
 
You should have hit him.

No, because I would have been stranded in the middle of bum-fuck Indiana with a van-load of convention supplies and an undriveable vehicle.
Oh, and a ticket. Because it would have been shitbag's word against mine.
 
Again, it is not about speed of your road, but about not obstructing other roads. In your example, your supermarket cashier lane would be so long, it would obstruct others who are still shopping. If you would be in dual line instead, then the line would be half as long, thus obstructing less of the traffic.
That's an entirely different problem. I was talking about a situation where two lanes turn into one or three into two. The congestion is always caused by the dipshits who leave merging until the last possible minute where either they have to stop, or they force other drivers to brake heavily causing the dreaded shock-wave effect in traffic.

Of course merging prematurely can also cause the tailback to hit other junctions that they wouldn't otherwise. Just fucking use the zip method. Another point for self driving cars, they can't come soon enough as far as I'm concerned. Then it won't be up to to the egotist idiots.
 
That's saved my ass so many times, I'm going to tell you are objectively wrong on this point. Tailgating is NEVER OK.


I didn't say tailgate. I'm talking about the ones that approach a jam with over reluctance and leave a good 10 car lengths in front of them. All you are doing with this selfish action is causing traffic waves behind you.
 
Here in town there is a place where the right lane is a turn lane and ends before the intersection and lots of people try to run up on the right(which is illegal to pass on the right) and cut into the line. One got upset because I didn't slow down and let him pass and ended up on the sidewalk, there was nobody behind me so he could have easily just dropped in behind me as he should have.

I swear, once I am retired I am going to spend my mornings just making laps round the block there and driving slow in the right lane and making "those people" get in the back of the line :p (jackhold isn't the word I use for those people, I think they are more "anal" than that)
I had that happen to me once as well. She scraped up and dented the whole side of her car and my tires were a bit scuffed. This is when I had my lifted jeep. I thought it was funny.
 
I didn't say tailgate. I'm talking about the ones that approach a jam with over reluctance and leave a good 10 car lengths in front of them. All you are doing with this selfish action is causing traffic waves behind you.

You inferred that with and I quote "all you grandmas that are leaving "crash distance" need to stop".

I still disagree with the last minute lane merge. People are assholes and screw everything up by last minute lane changes. No one goes by the rules.
 
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