The most stupidly named video card of all time ?

Sparrow_69 said:
Real 3d Starfighter 3d. Terrible card. This was one of the first 3d agp cards available, which I purchased to complement my PII 350mhz overclocked to 392mhz lol. The card had 8meg of frame buffer memory. System memory was used to store textures through the agp bus. Although the card was relatively cheap compared to the 3dfx voodoo 2, there was a short stutter in games everytime new textures loaded ie. constantly in Quake 2. Returned the card for a refund shortly after. If memory serves, the card used the first intel graphics chip (forget name)
Click to expand...

The i740 wasn't horrible, if oyu had the right card. Real screwed theirs up royally though :)
 
jbltecnicspro said:
I completely agree with you. One card that sticks out this generation is the Geforce GT-640... It has how many variants? :rolleyes: Personally, I think the dumbest naming convention is probably when ATI/AMD started branding their cards with the "HD" moniker. As shockingly different as the R-Series naming is, it's a lot easier to stomach than the "HD" cards.

EDIT: Found the GT-640 variants. It really depends on whether or not you get OEM...

1. Retail GT-640 - 2 GB DDR3 VRAM - 384 cores, 900 Mhz clock
2. Retail GT-640 - GDDR5 VRAM - 384 cores, 1046 Mhz clock - Basically, this is the faster one to get for retail
3. OEM GT-640 - DDR3 VRAM (128-bit) - 384 cores, 797 Mhz clock
4. OEM GT-640 - DDR3 VRAM (192-bit) - 144 cores (Fermi?) -
5. OEM GT-640 - GDDR5 VRAM - 384 cores, 950 Mhz clock - this is the fastest OEM variant, at least on paper.

There we go.
Click to expand...

Yea, this is a huge pet-peeve of mine. because they aren't even differentiating the actual model name. The postfix era might have been an alphabet soup of X's, G's, T's and L's, but an X800XL was obviously (if you weren't an idiot) a different card than an X800XT

I didn't really mind the X800XTX days... yes it was a lot of X's, but it made sense considering the X is roman numeral 10, following up the 9800 series, so you've basically got 10800XT following up the 9800XT. Also, the trick was to avoid the postfix "L" like the plague (light edition, loser edition) I dunno, as long as the name is procedurally generated it doesn't bother me because there is often some logic. Unfortunately SLI/CF and the increasing segmentation of the marketplace has made the situation acutely bad since there are so many different chips being used in so many different places and too many re-brands
 
Not stupid names, but these still give me a geek hard-on :

Canopus Spectra 2500
Canopus Pure3D
Canopus Pure3D II
 
piscian18 said:
boo_this_man_half_baked.gif
Click to expand...

Hey man, we're talking names here, not performance, the cards rocked, no doubt, but the naaaames....
 
Guillemot : Hercules Terminator Beast



Back when Video Cards had style, fuck yeah! :cool:
 
Elios said:
XFX card names... /thread
Click to expand...

My thoughts exactly! :D I loved their Geforce 8500GT Fatal1ty 'Professional Series' card a friend bought from Best Buy back in the day. Card had DDR2 memory and could barely run 3dMark06....not sure what they were thinking with that one!
 
Any point in time where a higher number is slower than a lower number, that's freakin stupid.
 
The ATI Xpert@Play and Xpert@Work. They were rage pro cards with 8 mb vram.
 
the worst name IMO is the "Twin Frozr"

fucking retarded beyond comprehension, whoever passed this off as acceptable should be fired

and yeah I know it isn't a card, it's the aftermarket cooler designed by MSI

but the name is on the card, so that's my vote
 
70 Polara said:
My thoughts exactly! :D I loved their Geforce 8500GT Fatal1ty 'Professional Series' card a friend bought from Best Buy back in the day. Card had DDR2 memory and could barely run 3dMark06....not sure what they were thinking with that one!
Click to expand...
The same thing when they shove a 512MB of GDDR2 on a card designed to only have 128MB GDDR2. So they can sell it for 800 bucks more at bestbuy.
 
Amazing. Convoluting any card name like that would turn me off, turning me toward (nearly) any other card.
 
Judge not a GPU buy their branding or name, but by their benchmarks and specs!
 
Sapphire Toxic X800 Pro ViVo

Who wants a toxic video card? Guess all the bad-ass labels were already taken, eh?
 
The GeForce 2 MX400 takes it for me. Not only was it a shitty card, but the MX400 moniker was misleading to me (as a kid) suggesting it was somehow better than the regular GeForce 2. Cliff notes: it wasn't.

I upgraded to that from a Voodoo 2, and it was a massive waste of $30.
 
I'll deviate slightly from the topic to reminisce of one of the great companies of the 90s who were bought out and are now completely different:

diamond multimedia.

They were the bomb in the late 90s, I loved them. Sadly they went out of business and re-acquired in name only by some other owner, and they aren't the same. Now they're just another me too AMD AIB and a tiny one at that, but they were huge back in the late 90s. The current Diamond MM isn't the same Diamond, not even close!

Back in the day, diamond multimedia was pretty much like EVGA is now. They were the #1 AIB by a mile and they were just everywhere. Best buy had rows and rows of Diamond MM cards. Back when you actually had to go to a store to buy PC parts, it's been a long time eh.
 
i have fond memories of my Diamond Stealth 64 even though it was S3, not amd.....
 
Chaintech Geforce 4 MX440 with 8x pci.

This was a pci video card with a chip that converted the native pci on the chip to agp 8x then another one that went back to pci.

That's my dumbest video card model that I've owned.
 
Sparrow_69 said:
Real 3d Starfighter 3d. Terrible card. This was one of the first 3d agp cards available, which I purchased to complement my PII 350mhz overclocked to 392mhz lol. The card had 8meg of frame buffer memory. System memory was used to store textures through the agp bus. Although the card was relatively cheap compared to the 3dfx voodoo 2, there was a short stutter in games everytime new textures loaded ie. constantly in Quake 2. Returned the card for a refund shortly after. If memory serves, the card used the first intel graphics chip (forget name)
Click to expand...

http://www.anandtech.com/show/202 :D
 
The Mac said:
i have fond memories of my Diamond Stealth 64 even though it was S3, not amd.....
Click to expand...

S3 was pretty great back in the day IMO. I remember buying a Diamond S3 virge card (can't remember the name of the card SKU though!) and the 2d performance was great. 3D performance not so great, but the only competition at the time was the rendition verite and powerVR (If I remember correctly).

Then a few months later the 3dfx voodoo was released and that was the REAL game changer. The rendition verite was an awesome chip but it could not hold a candle to the voodoo; I still couldn't believe it after playing GLquake for the first time, I was hooked. The graphics were just unbelievable compared to software rendering. Speaking of which, my first V1 card was a Diamond Monster 3D.

I loved diamond back in the day, too bad they went under. Man, those were good times for PC gaming. Unlike current times, there were tons of PC only franchise game titles. Doesn't really happen so much anymore due to cross platform development.
 
xoleras said:
S3 was pretty great back in the day IMO. I remember buying a Diamond S3 virge card (can't remember the name of the card SKU though!) and the 2d performance was great. 3D performance not so great, but the only competition at the time was the rendition verite and powerVR (If I remember correctly).
Click to expand...

Ah, the first 3d decelerator :)
 
Since Newtek's Video Toaster was mentioned. I think BitBoys Oy's Glaze3D should get a nod.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top