I don't ride the Metro because "a man gets on the MTA In L.A. and dies. It's six hours before anyone realizes there's a corpse riding around LA." And I'm not going to meet my demise like Tom Cruise at the hands of Jamie Foxx
Because that guy in the corner who looks like a slack-jawed Patrick Stewart isn't wearing pants... and keeps looking at you "funny". True story actually...
Money is needed to ride the metro, and I'm broke. Everyone knows the Metro never runs on time. Terrorists like to target the Metro. Sometimes, they are six years old. Repairs to the metro take FOR-EVER. Other, faster transportation is available... like my car!
Shouldn't ride the metro because people or you may fall down to the tracks and lose a leg. Like that one time it happened while taking the D uptown in Manhattan!
Well, the only mass transit system here underground is the sewer. And I'm not about to go riding with the hankys, not even at christmas. Talking poo is where I draw the line. Screw you guys, I'm a going home.
dont fear the metro for the metro doesn't fear you, if you do fear the metro then follow below procedures.
1. do not moon the metro as it passes by, you will get a cap in your a$$
2. do not pee on both lines of the metro, you will get ur noodle zapped off
3. do not run from the metro crying like a baby, you will get posted online and made fun of.
Other then the above procedures everything else is good.