No.I wish for your kids, if you have/are having any, to never do fucking stupid things, ever. Then, once they're 18, you can claim to be a first class parent. Congratulations, you are truly one of the few. Kudos.
For the mere mortals among us, our kids do stupid things. When I was young, I did stupid things that if gone wrong, could have put a good hurtin' on me or killed me.
In this case setting oneself on fire is a stupid thing from any angle. But not from a kid's angle when they see some fake shit on youtube and maybe have something to prove in front of their friends.
Oh, I know I know, you teach children about fire and danger and stupid and don't follow others and youtube is stupid. But guess what, they'll still do stupid things. It's not always the parents fault.
And unless you do extreme helicoptering, which IMO on the whole is more hurtful to children, well you're not gonna catch all of those things.
Instead of berating the parent, I'm glad she openly spoke about it even though most likely she must've felt humiliated and judged by people like you already. Good on her, she might prevent a few of those instances.
Her 12 year old child... doused herself in alcohol and lit herself on fire.
This is not stupidity/chance, like playing with a gun or playing with matches and setting house on fire.
She intentionally doused herself in alcohol and lit herself on fire...
This is definitely something the parent could have done something about or been aware of. There was definitely something else wrong that allowed this to happen. This was no sad accident.
Twelve year olds do not douse themselves in alcohol and light themselves on fire.
(Your point is definitely valid for normal stupid shit that can happen).