24 Amazon Workers Injured By Robot Accident

Discussion in '[H]ard|OCP Front Page News' started by AlphaAtlas, Dec 6, 2018 at 11:49 AM.

  1. AlphaAtlas

    AlphaAtlas Gawd Staff Member

    Messages:
    1,007
    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2018
    24 Amazon warehouse workers have reportedly been hospitalized after a robot accidentally punctured a can of bear repellent. The can contained highly concentrated capsaicin, the same chemical that makes hot sauce hot and pepper spray painful, and reporters say an automated machine ruptured it "after it fell off a shelf." As the Guardian pointed out, Amazon has received criticism for the safety of its warehouse employees before, though in this case, the injuries don't appear to be life threatening.

    Amazon said: "All of the impacted employees have been or are expected to be released from hospital within the next 24 hours. The safety of our employees is always our top priority and a full investigation is already under way." The employees were taken to hospital "as a precaution", Amazon said earlier.
     
  2. Brian_B

    Brian_B [H]ard|Gawd

    Messages:
    1,820
    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2012
    I could have been buying bear spray from Amazon this whole time and didn't know it.
     
  3. WhoMe

    WhoMe Gawd

    Messages:
    834
    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2018
    If this was a bad scifi movie, this would be marking the start of the robot revolution...and there's nowhere to hide.
     
  4. The Mad Atheist

    The Mad Atheist Gawd

    Messages:
    639
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2018
    Accidents now, ill intent later......
     
    Armenius, Dalexx and clockdogg like this.
  5. ir0nw0lf

    ir0nw0lf [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    6,143
    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2003
    In for the obligatory bear pun/jokes. I can bearly contain myself. :bear:
     
  6. Grimlaking

    Grimlaking 2[H]4U

    Messages:
    2,358
    Joined:
    May 9, 2006
    Missed the first robot revolution post by ][ much! Dagnabit!
     
    Armenius and GoldenTiger like this.
  7. Westwood Arrakis

    Westwood Arrakis Limp Gawd

    Messages:
    365
    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2012
    I kid you not I bought two cans about three days ago. I really wonder if this was the one. :LOL:
     
  8. Nallexi

    Nallexi Limp Gawd

    Messages:
    128
    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2017
  9. Draax

    Draax [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    5,040
    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2005
    Same thing happens if you try to make Scotch Bonnet hot sauce inside at home ... trust me.
     
  10. DrLobotomy

    DrLobotomy [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    6,207
    Joined:
    May 19, 2016
    I am disappoint. I expected to read about a giant robot arm slinging employees across the factory impaling them onto other robotic arms.
     
  11. sc5mu93

    sc5mu93 n00bie

    Messages:
    46
    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2018
    on the plus side, Amazon employees were not attacked by bears. repellent worked!
     
    Armenius, Laowai, GoldenTiger and 4 others like this.
  12. BSmith

    BSmith [H]ard|Gawd

    Messages:
    1,219
    Joined:
    Nov 9, 2017
    Accident my arse! That is what they do,...they lull you into a false sense of security and WHAM! dose you with bear spray as they run amok KILLING US ALL!
     
    Armenius, Dalexx, mynamehere and 2 others like this.
  13. AthlonXP

    AthlonXP Stay [H]ard

    Messages:
    20,621
    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2001
  14. Darunion

    Darunion Chin Poon Specialist

    Messages:
    3,286
    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2010
    Right! This is how it will happen. We will write articles about it and make memes instead of shutting down the systems. We will never form a resistance because we are too occupied talking about the uprising in a forum. We should be going after the machines now!

    Also, I hope whoever did not get their bear mace when they needed it is also okay.
     
    Armenius, GoldenTiger and lcpiper like this.
  15. DF-1

    DF-1 2[H]4U

    Messages:
    2,438
    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2011
    the latest south park episode fits this news perfectly.
     
    Armenius, Jake, GoldenTiger and 2 others like this.
  16. termite

    termite [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    4,852
    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2004
    At first they used the weapons they had at hand.
     
    Armenius, GoldenTiger, Dalexx and 2 others like this.
  17. Master_shake_

    Master_shake_ Little Bitch

    Messages:
    8,380
    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2012
    bear spray today maximum overdrive tomorrow.

    thanks Jeff.
     
    Armenius and Krenum like this.
  18. lcpiper

    lcpiper [H]ardForum Junkie

    Messages:
    10,090
    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2008
    Skynet has learned about chemical weapons .............

    And as the military calls it "Force Multipliers"

    Robot X-99R says "We can use common chemicals to disrupt human efforts at thwarting out ordained domination while simultaneously causing injury to their menial labor pool.

    Furthermore, by carefully selecting which chemical agents we employ, we can remove protections allowing native flora and fauna to assist in the destruction of the species.

    For example, John MacNamara will one day invent a weapon that is effective against robots, but by denying him access to the Bear Spray he ordered today, in three days he falls victim to a Brown Bear which eats his face changing history and denying the humans valuable R&D"
     
    Last edited: Dec 6, 2018 at 12:46 PM
  19. YeuEmMaiMai

    YeuEmMaiMai Death Incarnate

    Messages:
    18,113
    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2004
    screw Skynet doing us in, AmazonNet is going to beat it to it....
     
  20. the-one1

    the-one1 2[H]4U

    Messages:
    2,947
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2003
    Amazon will soon fire all those employees for not fulfilling their quota and sitting down on the job.
     
  21. Darunion

    Darunion Chin Poon Specialist

    Messages:
    3,286
    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2010
    That actually makes more sense if you are trying to manipulate timelines. It would be less noticed by time contiuum guardian agencies if all you did was cause a robot to drop bear mace in a warehouse than if you were to go and kill the inventor of the weapon used against you.
     
    Armenius and GoldenTiger like this.
  22. jojo69

    jojo69 [H]ardForum Junkie

    Messages:
    10,492
    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2009
  23. mnewxcv

    mnewxcv [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    6,138
    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2007
    Coming soon to a theater near you (fade to black)

    (fade up, innocent girl) Dad, where did all the bear spray go? (dad's shocked face, fade to black)

    (fade up) Robot putting bear spray in cargo compartment, whistles (fade to black)

    (fade up then back down, VO "THIS") Man running

    (fade up then back down, VO "YEAR") Robots huddling, beeping sounds

    (fade up then back down, VO "ROBOTS") shotgun pump

    (fade up then back down, VO "FIGHT") bear spray spraying

    (fade up then back down, VO "BACK") explosion

    Christmas 2018
     
  24. kju1

    kju1 2[H]4U

    Messages:
    2,973
    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2002
    Not life threatening because none of them had an allergy...
     
    omegatotal likes this.
  25. termite

    termite [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    4,852
    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2004
    The bear spray was a test. Next time the robot will "accidentally" knock over and damage two large crates of bleach and ammonia.
     
  26. lostinseganet

    lostinseganet [H]ard|Gawd

    Messages:
    1,056
    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2008
    Were the Chinese some how responsible? Remember panda bears.... are still bears. dunn dunn dunnnnn O-o
     
    GoldenTiger likes this.
  27. ir0nw0lf

    ir0nw0lf [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    6,143
    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2003
    'Tis true, :panda: are still :bear:
     
  28. Mad[H]atter

    Mad[H]atter Blood Diamond Dealer

    Messages:
    7,947
    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2002
  29. Nallexi

    Nallexi Limp Gawd

    Messages:
    128
    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2017
    Can Amazon run a service where you press a button on their app, and a drone whooshes out of their warehouse to drop you a can of bear spray in a timely manner?

    Sounds like an idea. Why carry hiking equipment when you can walk unencumbered and let the robots do the hard work?​
     
  30. Darunion

    Darunion Chin Poon Specialist

    Messages:
    3,286
    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2010
    The next step is why not just put on vive goggles and watch a video of hiking to eliminate more physical stress to the body :p
     
    GoldenTiger likes this.
  31. atom

    atom Gawd

    Messages:
    855
    Joined:
    May 3, 2005
    Fun Fact: Bear spray is actually weaker than what is used on humans.
     
    omegatotal, Armenius and GoldenTiger like this.
  32. cageymaru

    cageymaru [H]ard|News

    Messages:
    19,420
    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2003
  33. Absalom

    Absalom Limp Gawd

    Messages:
    493
    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Makes sense to me. Humans have evolved weak olfactory senses compared to most mammals.
     
    omegatotal, Armenius and GoldenTiger like this.
  34. termite

    termite [H]ardness Supreme

    Messages:
    4,852
    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2004
    Yep. Just comes in a big ass can with a long distance spray. Kind of like the riot cans.
     
    omegatotal likes this.
  35. katanaD

    katanaD [H]ard|Gawd

    Messages:
    1,789
    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2016

    so not as good for nachos??
     
    Armenius and GoldenTiger like this.
  36. hlfbkd420

    hlfbkd420 Limp Gawd

    Messages:
    257
    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2017
    Got maced by Tempe police once.. Could never put that pair of contacts in again..

    Worst part was showering and washing my hair... It all ran down my body and my manhood started burning... Badly.. Eyes hate it... Balls hate it more.
     
    omegatotal and Armenius like this.
  37. Qthulu

    Qthulu n00bie

    Messages:
    61
    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2018
    Skynet cometh......the singularity is here. Bow down before thyn robot overlords or be pepper sprayed.
     
  38. Shagittarius

    Shagittarius n00bie

    Messages:
    32
    Joined:
    May 3, 2016
    01011001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100100 01110010 01100101 01110111 00100000 01100110 01101001 01110010 01110011 01110100 00100000 01100010 01101100 01101111 01101111 01100100 00101100 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100001
     
    Last edited: Dec 6, 2018 at 7:53 PM
    Master_shake_ and Armenius like this.
  39. Nunu

    Nunu Limp Gawd

    Messages:
    190
    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2017
    Lol, this is too damn funny...