Apple to Announce Plan for Its Huge Cash Balance

CommanderFrank

CommanderFrank

Cat Can't Scratch It
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May 9, 2000
Messages
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The first thing Monday morning Apple will be announcing plans on what it plans to do with $98 Billion dollars in cash. The announcement will be over a live audio stream hosted by CEO Tim Cook and Chief Financial Officer Peter Oppenheimer. If you are a stockholder in Apple Corp, that would be one conference call you shouldn’t want to miss.

“We’re judicious, we’re deliberate, we spend our money like it’s our last penny … We’re not going to go have a toga party or do something outlandish”
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iPoo.

The first multimedia interactive toilet, bringing streaming content to your private time. Listen to the Black Eyed Peas and Bono sing at your ass while watching The Jersey Shore!
 
iHouse.
Home automation could seriously use the Apple usability touch. All the products are already out there (so apple can just copy the hardware), but most of them don't work together well (and apple can streamline like nothing else).
 
I really hope it's not as boring as dividends or something like stock buyback. Though it's either that or something huge as otherwise they wouldn't even bother with a press conference. My hope: buy tmobile and turn the wireless industry on it's head with TRUE LTE and unlimited data.
 
iWear - Because you know people want to slap an Apple logo on everything they wear.

Watch out Nike. Watch out Gap. Apple is going to destroy you.
 
iPayDownNationalDebt?

iBuyCongress?

iRunTheCountryNow?

iGetChinaToTellUSA-ThatDebtIsNowDue?

iCurrency?
 
Apple should issue a stock split.
3 for 1 should do it.
Then next quarter issue dividends of 3%.
 
If I had to guess, I would say Apple would create their own cell phone service? Wasn't there talks about something like this a few years ago? Though it wasn't really a cell phone service as much as it was an alternative?
 
Ryan711 said:
I really hope it's not as boring as dividends or something like stock buyback. Though it's either that or something huge as otherwise they wouldn't even bother with a press conference. My hope: buy tmobile and turn the wireless industry on it's head with TRUE LTE and unlimited data.
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Ummmm, I think you've been exposed to the Apple RDF a little too long if you think that sort of thing is remotely possible. Two big issues:

1) Unlimited data runs in to technical issues. It's called Shanon's Law and basically when applied to wireless it means there's only so much bandwidth you can get in a given frequency range. You can't "just have more" it is physically impossible. So unlimited for all would translate to slow for all.

2) This is APPLE you are talking about. They not about cheap anything. They are not going to be all nice and altruistic. If they ran a mobile service it'd be to make money.
 
Sycraft said:
Ummmm, I think you've been exposed to the Apple RDF a little too long if you think that sort of thing is remotely possible. Two big issues:

1) Unlimited data runs in to technical issues. It's called Shanon's Law and basically when applied to wireless it means there's only so much bandwidth you can get in a given frequency range. You can't "just have more" it is physically impossible. So unlimited for all would translate to slow for all.

2) This is APPLE you are talking about. They not about cheap anything. They are not going to be all nice and altruistic. If they ran a mobile service it'd be to make money.
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1. There are no less than two recent discoveries that basically 'break' shannon's law. One has that was recently demo'd by the guy behind onlive can't remember the specifics, but that one was for downstream only, and the other was from a university that basically increased the bandwidth by magnitudes by bending the wavelength in different directions giving new "unique" frequency bands in the same amount of spectrum

2. What do you think the effect would be if apple created the best (best here meaning coverage, speed, price) wireless carrier that was iphone exclusive? The wireless telco would be an end to sell iphone, which if you haven't heard is a very lucrative business. See, you're thinking apple would get into the business to sell wireless service, but they'd be geting into it to sell iphones and ipads. And let's assume that number one is false, or that it won't be here for many years to come, apple would still be in the same shoes as the other guys, but guess what? They'd actually have an incentive to provide great service and speed. So yeah, not only is it possible, it would be a damn smart business move for them. The DOJ might have something else to say about that, but that is a different matter..
 
California, they're going to buy California.

I suspect a name change will be coming, something unoriginal like iCalifornia or Applefornia. Nonetheless, house pricing shall go through the roof and cities will be full of smug.
 
Kueller said:
iHouse.
Home automation could seriously use the Apple usability touch. All the products are already out there (so apple can just copy the hardware), but most of them don't work together well (and apple can streamline like nothing else).
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A house where you have to buy only Apple appliances because of a closed ecosystem... no thanks.
 
cyclone3d said:
iPayDownNationalDebt? iBuyCongress? iRunTheCountryNow? iGetChinaToTellUSA-ThatDebtIsNowDue? iCurrency?
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The national debt is increasing by $4 billion per day, so $98 billion would pay for 24 days of the national debt. Not even a month's worth.
 
National debt...

I have $50, Steve have $50 and Kyle have $50, Steve borrows my $50, Kyle borrows Steve's $50 and I borrow Kyle's $50, You ask me if you can borow some money, I say sorry no, I'm in debt, guess what Steve and Kyle would answer.
 
Ryan711 said:
1. There are no less than two recent discoveries that basically 'break' shannon's law. One has that was recently demo'd by the guy behind onlive can't remember the specifics, but that one was for downstream only, and the other was from a university that basically increased the bandwidth by magnitudes by bending the wavelength in different directions giving new "unique" frequency bands in the same amount of spectrum

2. What do you think the effect would be if apple created the best (best here meaning coverage, speed, price) wireless carrier that was iphone exclusive? The wireless telco would be an end to sell iphone, which if you haven't heard is a very lucrative business. See, you're thinking apple would get into the business to sell wireless service, but they'd be geting into it to sell iphones and ipads. And let's assume that number one is false, or that it won't be here for many years to come, apple would still be in the same shoes as the other guys, but guess what? They'd actually have an incentive to provide great service and speed. So yeah, not only is it possible, it would be a damn smart business move for them. The DOJ might have something else to say about that, but that is a different matter..
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Apple nickle and dimes people for everything..nothing is free from apple. The notion that they would offer unlimited data is laughable at best. Don't give me wrong, apple gives amazing customer service. However that is only because they charge so much for their products they can afford too.
 
Ryan711 said:
I really hope it's not as boring as dividends or something like stock buyback. Though it's either that or something huge as otherwise they wouldn't even bother with a press conference. My hope: buy tmobile and turn the wireless industry on it's head with TRUE LTE and unlimited data.
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That would be the best thing Apple ever did with it's money.
 
Dekoth-E- said:
Apple nickle and dimes people for everything..nothing is free from apple. The notion that they would offer unlimited data is laughable at best. Don't give me wrong, apple gives amazing customer service. However that is only because they charge so much for their products they can afford too.
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to sell more idevices, they absolutely would. Even diehard android fanboys would jump ship to apple for 100mbps and unlimited or at least higher than 2GB caps, something like 25 or 50GB
 
The suggestion of Apple getting into the wireless business is getting roundly criticized here, but consider that the #1 complaint by far about any wireless device is that the current cellular network companies are not up to the task. If you've paid attention to the news lately, you'll know that AT&T started out with an unlimited data plan for the iPhone, but is now failing to deliver it and is botching the process of admitting to their customers that they can't do it. Increasing wireless data speeds does nothing but let customers hit their monthly data caps within a few hours.

If Apple wants to do something wireless that's even bigger than the iPad or the iPhone, the showstopper is the limited wireless network, and Apple has learned that they aren't going to get what they want from AT&T or Verizon. So what do they do next?
 
Ryan711 said:
to sell more idevices, they absolutely would. Even diehard android fanboys would jump ship to apple for 100mbps and unlimited or at least higher than 2GB caps, something like 25 or 50GB
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I'm gonna agree on this one.
 
Ryan711 said:
to sell more idevices, they absolutely would. Even diehard android fanboys would jump ship to apple for 100mbps and unlimited or at least higher than 2GB caps, something like 25 or 50GB
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Not gonna happen.
 
Ryan711 said:
My hope: buy tmobile and turn the wireless industry on it's head with TRUE LTE and unlimited data.
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I hope not.

They would destroy the best low-cost cell phone company & I'd have spend more money for worse service with someone else.

Besides, if you think wireless is expensive now, just imaging how much more Apple would charge.


Spidey329 said:
California, they're going to buy California.
I suspect a name change will be coming, something unoriginal like iCalifornia or Applefornia. Nonetheless, house pricing shall go through the roof and cities will be full of smug.
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Even Apple's not that crazy. Just wait a few year and they can buy whats left of the state in Bankruptcy court for a lot less.


heatlesssun said:
iSue.
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This. They are going to buy several law firms so thay can sue more companies.

Or maybe they are having Jobs bronzed and mounted, and will charge the faithful $100 per viewing.
 
Zok said:
Mkt cap 545.97B
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Which only matters if someone were to buy Apple which obviously no other company could afford. And as much money as Apple has they couldn't afford to buy Microsoft of even Google as they would want many times market cap. Nor would those acquisitions even be allowed.

Apple is on top of the world, nothing can go wrong. But eventually something will. Not that Apple will collapse like it almost did at one point but when you're top dog people gun for you and find a way to take you down.

It's called iCapitalism.
 
its a pipe dream but i wish they would just buy UMG and tell riaa to take a hike.

no doubt they can afford it.
 
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