Another question for those with families.

Well, particularly those with (younger) kids.

What is your opinion on your kids gaming? I've got my first coming along this summer. I can't help but think back in the 90's I was glued to the screen playing through Faxandu, fighting Bald Bull, and exploring the world in Final Fantasy 1 for NES. All I did was game. Drinking Mt Dew by the 2L bottle, and hammering down whatever snack that was in reach. I almost never went outside. All I did was stare at that screen. Even through college playing Lineage ][ and Warcraft I was gaming 40h+ a week. Easy. Nowadays I travel the country by motorcycle, go camping almost every weekend, and tinker in the garage with whatever motorsport project I have going on at the moment. I can't get enough of the outdoors now.

Once our kiddo gets older, I'm going to do what I can to deter them from gaming. I don't want them to waste their lives away like I did when I was younger. My wife feels the same way. Though, I do have fleeting thoughts it'd be nice to play co-op with them.

Just curious if others have introduced gaming to their younger kids.

This is a forum where the majority are going to heavily lean towards GAME GAME GAME.

In our home, with 5 kids between the ages of 5 and 11, the kids might play 2 hours a WEEK on their tablets or ipods. Outside of that we have an Xbox360 and a Wii and both are only for Netflix. We consider time outside the home, or on their studies, to be better use of their time.

It is funny, though, if I think about it, that when I was a kid I played a LOT of video games, both on console and PC. Living on a farm made sure that my time was definitely divided between gaming and working, however. My kids do not live on a farm, and the chore load between 5 kids is small. So we feel the need to watch more closely how much they play on a screen and how much is outside time. How I grew up and how they are growing up is very different, so the situation requires a different outlook. Sure, I turned out great, imo, but that doesn't mean the way I was raised is the best in this scenario.

I let my kids (3 and 7) play games on their tablets, and my older one has a 3DS and access to a pile of old NES/SNES games with a RetroPie.

The key isn't to cut the games out, it's just to limit the "screen time". Give them a couple hours a day to watch TV/movies or play games, and the rest of the day should be spent reading, running around the playground, building with LEGO, coloring, etc.

Video games, TV, movies and electronics are a pretty big part of modern life. I don't think of it as "wasting their lives away". I played a whole lot when I was a kid, and I feel I've turned out pretty well.

I have only a (step)daughter who is 6, and she has an iPad (not of my or her mother's doing), which she feels the need to stick her face in all - the damn - time. The sad part is not that she wants to use it for gaming, but for watching odd (REALLY odd) Youtube videos of people making up stories with dolls, so her screen time is limited to less than 2 hours a week with that device.

I have actually voiced to her that if she wants to play something that makes her think or do something more than just mindlessly tune out, she is more than welcome to. I personally think that if she wants to spend quite a bit of time in something like Minecraft, or even getting into the old school NES Mario games (yes, I still have my original) I'd accept that, and even play with her on them. Just seems like 8/10 times, it has to be Youtube, or play with real world toys, with Youtube rarely being given by either parent. I think look back at my gaming as a kid, and can see where it helped me find solutions to puzzles that may not even seem like puzzles, on top of actual Puzzle games like Myst and Rama (when you teach yourself Base 16 to figure out a game puzzle, you kinda have some ammo against the "games are useless" crowd) On top of that, I can honestly say that video games introduced me to some of my most favorite Sci-fi authors (namely, Rama and Arthur C. Clarke) that I had no idea about.

While all of this is way ahead of my little girl, I know that I want her to be introduced to the idea of gaming in general, and then let her decide what she likes in it as she grows up, on top of seeing that video games can be more than just "something for children."

Seems a little extreme to completely deter them from games, especially since you turned out completely fine, and most of us did as well. I used to spend unfathomable hours playing video games from early childhood to my early 20's, it was all I was interested in, but something changed along the way. I went to a great school, got a great list of companies under my career belt, and am working on a startup. People change for the better if you let time works its magic. Plus, games have been proven to increase hand eye coordination, the way the brain thinks, and all that bullshit, so there are some pros!

Introduce them slowly to games I'd say, then just make sure to introduce other hobbies in there, so they are well rounded.

BiH115 said:

Seems a little extreme to completely deter them from games, especially since you turned out completely fine, and most of us did as well. I used to spend unfathomable hours playing video games from early childhood to my early 20's, it was all I was interested in, but something changed along the way. I went to a great school, got a great list of companies under my career belt, and am working on a startup. People change for the better if you let time works its magic. Plus, games have been proven to increase hand eye coordination, the way the brain thinks, and all that bullshit, so there are some pros!

Introduce them slowly to games I'd say, then just make sure to introduce other hobbies in there, so they are well rounded.

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but there are those who didnt turn out good to, my brother is one of those that should of been detered from video games, he's a 22 year old child who still lives with his mother and would rather lose his job then not make clan night in one of his games which means he has never held a job for longer than 3-4 weeks.

As to the OP good for you, my kids are 4 and 8 and they love to game but they have to earn them. My son must complete his chores and homework as well as read for 30 minutes (book of his choice). They both also must be in a sport, currently they both do hockey in winter and soccer in summer. My daughter has less requirements since she's only 4 so I dont let her play unless her brother can lol. But when they do get to play they have tablets, Nintendo DS and access to my Wii and xbox one with certain games like lego avengers and minecraft (both of which are a blast to play with them)

The trick is moderation, they shouldn't be allowed to play for 3 hours a night whenever they want. Make them earn it and make them understand games/tv is a PRIVILEGE and not a right and they will turn out fine. We just got my sons report card and are very pleased with his schooling so he got 2 hours of straight Nintendo DS time with his sister as a reward, could hear both goons howling and laughing as they played Mari kart DS together. Video games are a great pastime for adults and children, but like anything to much is bad.

Gaming with modern games will mess them up for life.
ADD galore stimulate galore for young brains...
They will sleep less and be tired all the time due to blue light LCDs.

Ragenrok said:

but there are those who didnt turn out good to, my brother is one of those that should of been detered from video games, he's a 22 year old child who still lives with his mother and would rather lose his job then not make clan night in one of his games which means he has never held a job for longer than 3-4 weeks.

As to the OP good for you, my kids are 4 and 8 and they love to game but they have to earn them. My son must complete his chores and homework as well as read for 30 minutes (book of his choice). They both also must be in a sport, currently they both do hockey in winter and soccer in summer. My daughter has less requirements since she's only 4 so I dont let her play unless her brother can lol. But when they do get to play they have tablets, Nintendo DS and access to my Wii and xbox one with certain games like lego avengers and minecraft (both of which are a blast to play with them)

The trick is moderation, they shouldn't be allowed to play for 3 hours a night whenever they want. Make them earn it and make them understand games/tv is a PRIVILEGE and not a right and they will turn out fine. We just got my sons report card and are very pleased with his schooling so he got 2 hours of straight Nintendo DS time with his sister as a reward, could hear both goons howling and laughing as they played Mari kart DS together. Video games are a great pastime for adults and children, but like anything to much is bad.

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No no, I definitely agree on the opposite front, it can be a terrible future for some. I agree with the moderation comment, it's all about managing your time, and it's really the same with anything else, finances, eating, etc. I like the fact that you use it as a reward as well, I've heard that works quite nicely!

My son is 8 now. He has a DS and a nice tablet he takes good care of. He has shown me some pretty dumb YouTube videos for sure. Some days he will spend a lot of time with it, but he would rather go out and ride his bike or play just about anything outside. No consoles yet. He hasn't even been that interested.
My girlfriends son is 16 and daughter is 13. They came from a metro area and absolutely love the outdoors. However the 16 yo has been having some grief issues and has retreated into the playstation, but it is his best contact to other family. Its kinda hard to tell where to draw the line.

Comixbooks said:

Gaming with modern games will mess them up for life.
ADD galore stimulate galore for young brains...
They will sleep less and be tired all the time due to blue light LCDs.

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This is how I've been looking at it too. That constant bombardment of animations.

And forget multiplayer gameplay. I watch those gamer-rage compilations and its freakin' scary man. Imagine those people today playing Battletoads. o_0

I think we're going to avoid that whole realm of gaming. Even as it is right now, I'm just meandering through Path of Exile until warmer weather gets here so I can get back onto the motorcycle. The past year or so, after 2h gaming I get stagnant and bored. Going 100% without gaming would honestly not have a detrimental effect on me.

I dunno, maybe make "game time" something they have to work towards, as a reward, after doing something else like a chore around the house or reading/homework... give each task a certain amount of "points" and when they get to 100 points they get an hour of gaming... make it a "game" in and of itself... with level-ups and bonus items after completing a game ("buy a new game", "buy a new controller", "buy a new console", etc...)

Comixbooks said:

They will sleep less and be tired all the time due to blue light LCDs.

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+1... gaming/tv at night is really bad idea for growing children, also not good for everyone... turning all that off 2 or 3 hours before sleeping can help a TON

Well I guess I'm the worst parent here because I don't place any restrictions. My oldest is 14 now, soon to be 15 and I let him play however long he wants. When he gets home from school he does his homework and then he games until he takes a shower before his bed time of 10:00. On weekends he wakes up about noon and then games until about midnight. We've tried placing hourly restrictions during the week and having him play every other day during the week but then I lapse and just let him play. He's at the age now to know what he wants to do with his time and what he needs to do. He's an A student so far. If I limited his gaming I don't know what he would be doing in place.

My youngest is 9 and I was not into gaming as much when he was born so I didn't get him in it as early. He plays games some but I don't have to worry about restricting him since he doesn't play long any way. He also is not the student that the oldest is. I sometimes think his lack of gaming at an earlier age actually hurt him. He has very poor reasoning and deduction skills..."if this happens then what conclusion can be drawn".

htpc_user said:

Well I guess I'm the worst parent here because I don't place any restrictions. My oldest is 14 now, soon to be 15 and I let him play however long he wants. When he gets home from school he does his homework and then he games until he takes a shower before his bed time of 10:00. On weekends he wakes up about noon and then games until about midnight. We've tried placing hourly restrictions during the week and having him play every other day during the week but then I lapse and just let him play. He's at the age now to know what he wants to do with his time and what he needs to do. He's an A student so far. If I limited his gaming I don't know what he would be doing in place.

My youngest is 9 and I was not into gaming as much when he was born so I didn't get him in it as early. He plays games some but I don't have to worry about restricting him since he doesn't play long any way. He also is not the student that the oldest is. I sometimes think his lack of gaming at an earlier age actually hurt him. He has very poor reasoning and deduction skills..."if this happens then what conclusion can be drawn".

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I actually agree with you on your 15 year old, you need to be able to allow them the freedom to make decisions on their own. Like you said his schooling has not suffered so he seems to be doing a good job at it. I think most of us agree to resticting young kids, a 5 year old shouldn't be glued to a tablet or game console but when they get to their teens giving them the ability to have control over their own lives is important.

By the time my son is 15 or 16 his limitations will be very small, by that age my mom was helping me do beer runs and dropping me off at house parties. Better to encourage their freedom, when you do they let you know what they are doing instead of sneaking around behind your back.

My 9 month old already watches me play games. Playing games is fine, but going outside is a must. I've a huge nerd. I'm in the IT field, I game, I watch Dragonball Z/Super; but I'm also very into fitness. I eat good, I work out 5x a week, I go up North to the pines to camp, off-road, hike, shoot guns, etc. Just because you're a gamer, doesn't mean you can't be into fitness, too. My son WILL be into both. I demand it.

Moderation is the key. Never too much of any one thing.

If you spend a night playing video games, make sure the next day is spent doing something outside, or split a day half and half.

For us the new the thing is have a schedule.

Unstructured gaming makes my kids irritable and very disrespectful. But structure game time is a win. They understand when they can play, and when it's over


For example

After school it's

60 minutes to settle in
30 minutes for chores
30 minutes help mom make dinner
45 minutes for dinner
60 minutes for games
Rest of the night is preparing for bed/next day

H-street said:

For us the new the thing is have a schedule.

Unstructured gaming makes my kids irritable and very disrespectful. But structure game time is a win. They understand when they can play, and when it's over


For example

After school it's

60 minutes to settle in
30 minutes for chores
30 minutes help mom make dinner
45 minutes for dinner
60 minutes for games
Rest of the night is preparing for bed/next day

Click to expand...

This is what we do. Structure and routine is key when they are younger.

My kids play Roblox and Wii U or 3DS. As long as they are playing nicely and taking breaks once in a while to run around the house or outside when it's warmer out I don't restrict them. I had ultra controlling and overprotective parents when I was growing up so I would guess that's why I let my kids have more freedom. If my mom let me play NES for 30 minutes a day I was lucky.

So far it has worked well. My kids are always complemented by teachers for being very well behaved and intelligent and they listen to us. My wife and I actually brought our 8 month, 5 year, and 8 year old children out to breakfast and a stranger at the restaurant paid our bill before he left telling the waitress that you just don't see families like that anymore.

That 60 minutes rest, 30 minutes this or that schedule would drive both me and my children crazy. It's home, it's not boot camp.

I dont think my Daughter will be big into it, but I definitely plan to introduce it to her. I hope she wants to play them a little bit but I will definitely be involved in them with her to steer her along a better path than I took and keep her focused on what matters more than games. I love them, I want to play them with her but I want her to better me in every way especially in school and work. I love hiking and biking so at least we can enjoy the outdoors if she hates video games

any way to bring educational things in to this? using internet to look things up and parents do it with your kids cause there be some really narly sites out there pretending to be educational but you all already knew this

LordVampyre said:

any way to bring educational things in to this? using internet to look things up and parents do it with your kids cause there be some really narly sites out there pretending to be educational but you all already knew this

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I think being involved early and helping them spot real / fake or questionable sites will help the most. At a certain age you wont be able to help much as they will do it behind closed doors but if they know how to spot BS from the get go everyone will be better off for it.

My daughter has an ipad 3 (hand me down) that she is allowed to game on. It is pretty locked down and she primarily has education based games on it. She also has my old gen 1 PS3 she can play Lego games or a few others.

She gets to play about an hour at a time, and very rarely on school nights. We have a system where she earns game/tv time in 15-30 minute blocks. This works very well for us and lets her get some screen time in without out it being an issue of her sitting in front of a TV all day or hovering over a tablet.

Internet wise we have any device she uses pretty locked down.

My son has his own tablet (locked down internet), but that's a privileged he earns time for, doing chores to help his mom out around the house; Trash, folding the laundry, small stuff, all give him a small amount of time (15-30 minutes) he can use to either put toward time on the device or toward his allowance. He actually has learned great balance for responsibility with this, either game time or a little more allowance.

He is outside, everyday at 3 (he home schools) and is outside for 1-2 hours, usually practicing soccer or if its snowy, there is a small hill, he wanted to start learning snow boarding, so hes done that a bit. The other times he tends to play with LEGO, which I will NEVER object too, infact I heavily encourage it. Being a little kid in heart myself, I still play with them too, DON'T JUDGE ME!

Most night-times are kind of a toss up, Monday nights and Thursday nights always have something in place, so that is never a question. Other nights are a toss up, movie night, game night (board games cause were old school like that).

During the weekend, if we have no plans already for Saturday, he gets 2 hours of game-time total on the Wii-U or the 3DS depending on his mood, this is in the afternoon to avoid over stimulation at night time so he can sleep. Saturday nights its usually me and the kiddo doing something, weather its watching Star Wars cartoons (Rebels or Clone Wars), than for the last half hour its shower and bed for the kiddo. He reads me Chronicles of Narnia (were on book 4) and he has progressed exponentially in his reading and has allowed his imagination to soar from it (hoping he will be reading The Hobbit and LoTR in the next few years as I did when I was a kid).

Sunday mornings always have something happening, than its either spending time with friends and their kids or we take a lazy afternoon, but we avoid gaming unless its absolutely dreadful outside.

The summer months are best, Friday afternoons until Sunday afternoon we are camping at least once a month, so we get a reset for the month.

So the big reason for this, I love gaming, my son loves to game, but I think people learn to love it more when they have it less, its almost like a reward for a hard week for him, not binge gaming, for me personally, that is my Friday night. I raise him on Nintendo, which he loves, Mario Kart, Mario 3d World, LEGO City Undercover. I am very much into what hes into, because I feel knowing what my kid is into will help us as parents to make sure its not going in a wrong direction. I refuse to bring CoD or anything into my sons life, not until hes of proper age to get it. Those are my parenting choices.

I have four kids. I provide them with more technology than any kid should ever have access too. I used to play the Bally Astrocade with my parents, a friend of my dad's, etc. when I was 3 years old. When I got my C64, that began my hours and hours in front of a screen. I was 6.

I'm very similar to how my parents were. I have all this stuff around because it's fun, it's what I like to do, and it's always been that way for me. I don't put artificial time limits on things for my kids. What I do though is keep an eye on things. If they're on their devices too much, aren't doing the things I've asked them to do, or don't go outside enough I scale them back or make them take breaks. If it's storming outside, any needed chores are done, and homework is where it should be, they can game all they want. It's better than watching TV. Two of my kids play sports in select leagues (daughter in Lacrosse and Rugby and son in Basketball.) One daughter is completely into animals, has several, and takes perfect care of all of them. My youngest is my little clone (except she's a girl ) and does whatever I do. hehehe

My family plays a LOT of games. PC, console, web, mobile, etc. We also do things as a family, the kids are social, they like to be outside. I really don't see a single problem from any of it. The trick is simply to know what's happening and react as needed. In my opinion and experience at least.

For me as a kid, I had automatic balance. I grew up in the woods. I had all the tech I could handle and then some, but I also had dirt bikes, bicycles, go karts, many acres to wander, dirt logging roads that went on for miles. I just wanted to split my time between all that, and playing my games naturally. We live in the city now, but my attitude and my wife's kind of point our kids in that general direction too.

I also probably wouldn't be in the line of work I am in now (primary day job, and also second job/hobby) if I didn't grow up with electronics, games, computers. I say make it available, participate, but keep an eye on things and adjust as necessary.