What People Search For On Google

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I am not sure whether I should laugh or cry at these figures. Hit the link for a much bigger list of search data, it is definitely one of the funniest things (intentional or not) you will read all day.
 
Man some of those leads me to believe that we are doomed as a human race.
 
I can tell you from personal experience the green poop is probably a direct result of 7-11 releasing their Black Ice Monster Slurpee.
 
LOL, wow that is some funny stuff. To be honest I have typed in one of those myself!
 
I find the 'Why' questions to be very interesting.

Try 'Why do I have Blood...'
 
I think the saddest part of it all is how many people TALK TO A FRIGGIN SEARCH ENGINE LIKE IT WAS A PERSON!!! God I hate that crap so much.

"So Google, where can I find an italian restaurant in my area?" Jesus christ.
 
LMAO, the funny thing is most people think that everything they read on the net is exactly true when only about 50% or less is what i call hard provable fact.....funny stuff
 
chrispix said:
I can tell you from personal experience the green poop is probably a direct result of 7-11 releasing their Black Ice Monster Slurpee.
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Also, as was the case with a co-worker of mine, it was Cancer of the Pancreas.
 
uviuar2 said:
I think the saddest part of it all is how many people TALK TO A FRIGGIN SEARCH ENGINE LIKE IT WAS A PERSON!!! God I hate that crap so much.

"So Google, where can I find an italian restaurant in my area?" Jesus christ.
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I appreciate the exaggeration to be funny, but there's a reason people structure their searches like they do, and it has to do with the endless number of message boards and forum communities where people structure their questions in the same fashion. It usually creates more relevant hits.

What's really sad is how searches with typos made it so close to the top.
 
chrispix said:
I can tell you from personal experience the green poop is probably a direct result of 7-11 releasing their Black Ice Monster Slurpee.
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I figured it'd be simply from eating White Castle.
8,380,000: Why men lie.
36,500,000: Why women lie.
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This may be proof than women lie more than men.
883,000,000: Why do I have no friends.
Almost 800,000,000: Who do I vote for.
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+1 LOL More people wanted to know why they have no friends than who to vote for.

These, among other reasons, is why I believe the average American to be a complete moron.
 
BigBeef said:
These, among other reasons, is why I believe the average American to be a complete moron.
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It is impossible for the average person to be stupid or a moron, since those terms mean dumber than average, and average is average. ;)
 
Jakalwarrior said:
It is impossible for the average person to be stupid or a moron, since those terms mean dumber than average, and average is average. ;)
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Average would be average if you're talking about average FPS in a benchmark test. But we are not. Average Americans are not 'average'....I am using dumb to describe 'average' Americans. Therefore, I will stick with my blanket statement and say average Americans are dumb.

If you've sold insurance to low class people, worked in retail, and have worked at a call center for informercials...you too would agree that these 'average' people are dumb. These are the same people asking these retarded questions.

If average people were all Bill Gates' and Warren Buffet's the average person would be 'smart'.

I like how some people didn't even ask a question, they just made a blatant statement, like "I hate Indiana Jones 4" or "Sleep is for sissies", I mean, wtf do they want Google to do, agree with them?
 
Aren't the numbers shown only "how many search results" you get when you do the search?
 
Why, why, why, I, I, I....very intersting. Funny I hardly ever use those term in searches. I agree with Ockie on this though, if dark humor was a search engine - it'd be Google.
 
Heh!:D
"I have three breasts"
Can't have too much of a good thing right?
 
Monkey34 said:
Heh!:D
"I have three breasts"
Can't have too much of a good thing right?
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LMAO, I tried typing in "I have three..." and

i have three testicles comes out as the top suggestion with 320,000 other people doing the same search.
 
"841,000: I have a large cat in my pants" tengo el gato en los pantelones! Blue Streak. Martin Lawrence "I'm a Federale!"
 
"My belly button smells like poop."

Well... no shit?
 
LOL! I looked for the green poop too. Figured out that it was the bottle of wine I drank the night before.
 
This wouldnt be available if Google weren't tracking everything you do. IXquick FTW!!
 
GJSNeptune said:
I appreciate the exaggeration to be funny, but there's a reason people structure their searches like they do, and it has to do with the endless number of message boards and forum communities where people structure their questions in the same fashion. It usually creates more relevant hits.

What's really sad is how searches with typos made it so close to the top.
Click to expand...
Well actually, this is a rather recent phenomenon. Due to Google reaching 'the end of the internet' just about every phrase ever spoken has been cataloged in some fashion or another. But cmon, we both know that most people arent using direct quote search targeting to find their answer, in THEIR minds they are quite simply asking a question because google is the answer guy!

This is on par with people who use google as a URL address bar, googling www.hotmail.com for instance.
 
uviuar2 said:
I think the saddest part of it all is how many people TALK TO A FRIGGIN SEARCH ENGINE LIKE IT WAS A PERSON!!! God I hate that crap so much.

"So Google, where can I find an italian restaurant in my area?" Jesus christ.
Click to expand...

This. Is one of my biggest pet peeves.

Chicago Italian restaurant

Is it that hard?
 
uviuar2 said:
I think the saddest part of it all is how many people TALK TO A FRIGGIN SEARCH ENGINE LIKE IT WAS A PERSON!!! God I hate that crap so much.

"So Google, where can I find an italian restaurant in my area?" Jesus christ.
Click to expand...

Typing in a questing is actually a good way to find other people who have asked that question. It usually bring up discussions about your exact question.
 
phrasing it that way usually gives you more relevant search results. I usually try typing it in the most logical way and have to pour over page after page of worthless hits. Or I can phrase it like a question and have the whole first page full of useful hits. It's stupid, but true. The idiots are dragging us down with them.
 
wtiger said:
phrasing it that way usually gives you more relevant search results. I usually try typing it in the most logical way and have to pour over page after page of worthless hits. Or I can phrase it like a question and have the whole first page full of useful hits. It's stupid, but true. The idiots are dragging us down with them.
Click to expand...
lol yes im not going to lie, it's true. 10 years ago these were the people who couldnt altavista their way out of a paper bag. I still remember having to educate friends on how to use a search engine properly. Now you really can just talk to it and expect someone out there in this world to use your language and bingo, find your result. But I still use subject search strings rather than sentence based.
 
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