Q: My {program, configuration, SQL statement} doesn't work
A: This is not a question, and I'm not interested in playing Twenty Questions to pry
your actual question out of you, I have better things to do.
On seeing something like this, my reaction is normally of one of the following:
do you have anything else to add to that?
Oh, that's too bad; I hope you get it fixed.
and this has exactly what to do with me?"