Lawyer: Apple Should Protect Me From My Porn Addiction

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I can't believe I am going to say this but I am definitely on Apple's side in this case.

The Plaintiff is a victim of Apple’s product that was sold to him without any warning of the damage the pornography causes. “But for” the Plaintiff’s use of the Apple product, the quality of the Plaintiff’s life would have been much better and injury would have been avoided.
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boduke said:
I lol'd.
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Especially this part:

Plaintiff said:
In using safari, the Plaintiff accidentally misspelled “facebook.com” which lead him to “fuckbook.com” and a host of web sites that caused him to see pornographic images that appealed to his biological sensibilities as a male and lead to an unwanted addiction with adverse consequences.
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I'm going to say this as delicately and respectfully as possible but the guy having bought an Apple I'm going to guess it was gay porn.
 
So this little poofta got caught being a poofta stalker and now blames apple for his poofta porn addiction?
 
Someone should sue him for 'threat of litigation and physical injury' caused by the natural and unavoidable anger reaction of a male reading his idiotic law suite.
 
DPI said:
I'm going to say this as delicately and respectfully as possible but the guy having bought an Apple I'm going to guess it was gay porn.
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All I watch on my macs is straight porn. You're the one having gay thoughts man. Gay thoughts.
 
Apple
Garden of Eden
The original sin

Damn, he should have figured out what was cumming errr... coming.
 
His claim that he typed fuckbook instead of facebook is great.

Problem is, the U is opposite hand of A, and K is opposite hand of E.

And Apple doesn't autocorrect words into fuck.
 
Maybe Apple should send Ron Jeremy over to his office with a consolation gift:

vaseline.jpg


:)
 
If he was looking at gay pr0n, does that mean he had a worm in his Apple? :eek:
 
Skripka said:
You obviously never browse damnyouautocorrect
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Give it a shot. Fucj Fucl Fuci Fucm, etc. Missing the last key by hitting a neighboring key normally suggests a correction. None of the suggestions are Fuck.
 
Re the mistyping of Facebook: there's an app for that so wtf this guy needs help not a case against apple
 
If someone tries to protect me from my pr0n addiction shit is going to get ugly.

Fast.
 
All joking aside, this is seriously indicative of a bigger problem these days. People nowadays don't take any f-ing responsibility for the things they do and want to "blame the other guy" because they can't help themselves..
 
Skripka said:
You obviously never browse damnyouautocorrect
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Aren't a good majority of those that have had others screw with their autocorrect settings, not really due to default autocorrect features...

Also lol @ "The Plaintiff began desiring, younger more beautiful girls featured in porn videos than his wife, who was no longer 21"
 
TBH, this is why you sign a prenup. If your wife ever ages past the age of 21, she is in violation of contract and your marriage is automatically annulled. Dumb bitch should have thought twice about aging in the first place.
 
WillC310 said:
All joking aside, this is seriously indicative of a bigger problem these days. People nowadays don't take any f-ing responsibility for the things they do and want to "blame the other guy" because they can't help themselves..
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"No self control, lost everything, trying to stop; same whiny story over and over for...ten minutes? Feels like ten hours."
 
Should I sue seagate for harddrive failures and corrupted pr0n that I lost; all 3TB of it? I was seriously in pain for weeks.
 
Midgets should sue the city they live in for putting the sidewalks too close to their asses. This makes them short.
 
Seriously, that lawyer shouldn't be able to practice law taking cases like this...
 
Klrgoten said:
Seriously, that lawyer shouldn't be able to practice law taking cases like this...
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It was a lawyer who is the plaintiff. :D

I think he would have better off suing Apple because their devices aren't water-proof, yet show porn. Apple had to know what was going to happen to the device ...
 
I just pray that this Einstein hasn't reproduced and contaminated our gene pool even more ... it would be funny though if the judge opened the trial with "whatthef*ckbook.com" ... hammered down the gavel and yelled "CASE DISMISSED" :D

Although I am sure there is actually some EXTREMELY small percentage of actual "sex addicts", I think most of them are just horny frackers who have no self control and jumped on the ready made excuse :rolleyes:
 
Qinsp said:
His claim that he typed fuckbook instead of facebook is great.

Problem is, the U is opposite hand of A, and K is opposite hand of E.

And Apple doesn't autocorrect words into fuck.
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You beat me to it.
No way could this be a typo, the 2 letters that are not even close togather. If it was the other way around, I can see how Apple might have autocorrected to Facebook.
 
Klrgoten said:
Seriously, that lawyer shouldn't be able to practice law taking cases like this...
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Lawyer should be disbared for life for such a stupid case.

Can't believe I'm actually defending Apple :(
 
nutzo said:
Lawyer should be disbared for life for such a stupid case.

Can't believe I'm actually defending Apple :(
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Juries (but not judges) should really be able to decide whether the plaintiff should pay all of the defendants' legal fees, etc...and it should be common. It's too dangerous for judges to do it, because corrupt judges could easily make it prohibitively expensive and risky to sue corporations for legitimate grievances, but if it was common for juries to nail plaintiffs for frivolous cases, they'd really be cut down on. It might be even better if juries could nail the plaintiff's lawyer specifically, with the stipulation that the cost can't be passed on to the plaintiff. Then frivolous cases would REALLY dry up. ;)
 
Mini-Me said:
Juries (but not judges) should really be able to decide whether the plaintiff should pay all of the defendants' legal fees, etc...and it should be common. It's too dangerous for judges to do it, because corrupt judges could easily make it prohibitively expensive and risky to sue corporations for legitimate grievances, but if it was common for juries to nail plaintiffs for frivolous cases, they'd really be cut down on. It might be even better if juries could nail the plaintiff's lawyer specifically, with the stipulation that the cost can't be passed on to the plaintiff. Then frivolous cases would REALLY dry up. ;)
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You really want to put our fate in the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty :eek: :eek: :eek:

:D
 
This guy needs his dick and hands cut off, and his eyes gouged out.
Then Apple should be made to pay a huge fine.

No! Not because of this douchebag!
Because they're...well Apple!
 
At first I read thinking "this guy is fucking crazy", then I read this...
UPDATE (5/12/2013, 5:15 p.m.): As a reader pointed out to us via email, and as noted in the comments, Chris Sevier (aka Mark Christopher Sevier) has been placed on disability inactive status by order of the Tennessee Supreme Court, due to “mental infirmity or illness.”
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So, basically he is "crazy", now I feel sorry for him more than anything.
 
Tudz said:
At first I read thinking "this guy is fucking crazy", then I read this...

So, basically he is "crazy", now I feel sorry for him more than anything.
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meh, the only thing that comes to mind are those people who pleed insanity
 
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